NAME: Hank Hill
OCCUPATION: Salesman of propane and propane accessories with honor and dignity.
THE TWO WOMEN IN HIS LIFE: His guitar Betsy and his wife Peggy.
QUOTE: "Nobody likes a knowitall who sits around talking about their genitalia."
DREAM VACATION: All expenses paid week long mowing workshop at the Lawn Care Academy of America
EMBARRASSING IMPERFECTION: A narrow urethra
NAME: Peggy Hill
OCCUPATION: Mother, housewife, substitute Spanish teacher
PROUDEST ACHIEVEMENT: Texas State Boggle Champion
QUOTE: "You cannot make authentic guacamole out of lima beans and Ritz crackers."
FAVORITE AUTHOR: Nolan Ryan
NAME: Robert (Bobby) Jeffrey Hill
OCCUPATION: Middle school student and pride and joy of Hank and Peggy
AMBITION: Ladies' man, runway model, proctologist, comic (stand-up or prop), shaman, salesman of propane and propane accessories
QUOTE: "I'm a little worried about being a slut."
GREATEST HERO: His dad
NAME: Luanne Platter
OCCUPATION: Senior at junior college.
BIG AMBITION: To be the first women president of my
sorority. Wait, maybe the second.
QUOTE: "It is very important to always know your name.
Here's a little trick I use to remember mine: I
think of a man named Lu, and a woman named Anne. They
meet in a kingdom in a forest - okay, maybe that's too
complicated."
SECRET SHAME: Was raised in a trailer park
NAME: Dale Gribble
OCCUPATION: Licensed owner/operator of "Dale's Dead Bug."
HOBBIES: Paranoia, smoking, golf
QUOTE: "Guns don't kill people. The Government does."
FAVORITE CONSPIRACY: You really believe they landed on the moon?
NAME: Bill Dauterive
OCCUPATION: Barber for the Armed Forces of America
MARITAL STATUS: Unhappily divorced
LIFE'S DREAM: Someday his wife will call and tell him where she is
QUOTE: "I like beer. Don't you like beer? I mean, I love beer."
NAME: Dang ol' Boomhauer, man, tell you 'bout myself woowee turn ons ladies and back seats man sunsets fast cars man, yup love that CK1 like catnip, turn-offs uhuh women golfers man love that Bob Dylan like a rolling stone what'd he say, brief man myself yup dang ol' internet man. Go www.click click click naked chicks yup that's all me uhuh on the next biography man.
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